Things...

Things did not go well today at the job interview. I was scheduled from 9:30 to 12:00 and arrived about 10 minutes early. The director told me that she had contacted the insurance company they use to get me some idea of what it would cost and that she would hear back from them before I was scheduled to go home. She took me to the room where Cheyenne would be and I said "good-bye" to her. It was hard for her, I know...but she did somewhat well. They put her with the 4 year olds because the 3 year old class was "just too full" So, my peanut baby was in a room of giants. The teacher seemed like a bitch. She was yelling when I walked in and seemed irriated with every one of her students. She was an older lady with white hair and yellow teeth. She seemed like a real piece of work. The director then lead me to one of the classrooms I would be working in. I would be a "floater" between 3 rooms; infants, 2's and 3's. The 3 year old teacher was so super nice and I was wishing my baby was there instead of with Grandma bitchy pants. The infant room was so soothing. It had rockers, a changing table, toys galore and babies- lots and lots of babies. I could tell they were shorthanded. I was informed that the infant room was were I would spend the majority of my day. I was thrilled. So, after I was finished up touring the 3 rooms the director took me to get Chey baby. It was at that moment that my excitement was diminished to nothing. " Katrina, I'm so sorry to have to tell you this but I'm not able to extend you the insurance. You see, an employee has to work a solid 40 hours per week in order to qualify for insurance and unfourtunately we are only able to accomidate 37 right now. I know insurance was a huge part of your decision to return to the work force and I'm sorry that I was not informed of these changes. In the past full time was considered 32-40 hours but due to rising costs of insurance we now require a full 40" OK....I thought to myself. "We'd love to have you here. You are amazing with the children and they really enjoyed having you here today. I hope that you will consider joining us even without the insurance" I smiled at her and said " Well, I'm sorry as well. I really enjoyed myself as well but I'm not willing to take a job that doesn't offer me insurance. If your policies should change please feel free to contact me" I grabbed Chey by the hand lead her to the car. I slammed my door shut and bawled the entire way home. I know this wasn't some "dream" high-paying job. But, it was something and the thought of not having to pay out of pocket for insurance was like a dream come true. I know that God does everything for a reason and that maybe something better will come along. But, it is so hard to see things that way when you had something in mind. I am going to continue to look for employment and I will not stop until I find something.

It is times like these that makes me wish I could go back in time and do what I was supposed to be doing. In my teens/early 20's I partied like no other. I spent my hard-earned money on cute designer jeans and shoes instead of socking it away. It is so frustrating to not be "qualified" enough for positions. I was browsing the classifieds today and every job related to customer service required either a college degree or a working knowledge of Quickbooks/Excel none of which I have or know. I did find a couple of "general office" positions that I'm sure I'm "quaified" for and I'll be sending out resumes this evening or 1st thing in the morning. One thing that I'm apprehensive about is sending her to daycare. The regular rates at the daycare I went to today offered fairly reasonable rates. By "fairly reasonable" I mean, cheap enough that it would make it worth it for me to work. BUT, I am not "sold" on the quality of care they provide there. Especially not in the room Chey was in today. It was horrible and I know that I would not be comfortable leaving her in the care of " Crabby Granny" So, I'll also have to find another center to consider.

I'm off for now. I'll post more later. I have to write about school falling through, baby plans and much more.....TTFN

Kat